Today was my co-teacher's birthday. She told me that she didn't want cake unless it was going to be shared with those who are special to her and that she didn't want a card signed by all the pre-k teachers (a tradition at the school). She's bitter because her contract will not be renewed for the school year and she thinks that the pre-k team is somehow against her and that they don't like her. She doesn't like many of them either and so she didn't want to share her special day with them. I thought, "Well, it's her perrogative!"
I felt kind of bad about it though. One of the other pre-k teacher's (who is friends with my co-teacher) agreed that it wouldn't look "nice" to get cake for just a few of us, neither would it look "nice" to not buy a cake at all. Soooo...I bought a cake. I also bought a card (from myself), and one for her "friends" to sign only. I just wanted to make her day special. Well, it backfired.
My co-teacher was very happy and appreciative but also very nasty, I'd opine, in how she handled the questions from others about why she didn't want the pre-k team to celebrate with her. She told one of the teachers that it is her day and that her birthday is as special to her as Christmas and so she only wanted to celebrate with those who are special to her. OUCH! Talk about brutally honest...but then again not so honest because when the teacher said "I hope I'm one of those people", my co-teacher replied "You are or else you wouldn't be in this room" (Now mind you, the teacher was not invited, but came to find out what was going on). The cake ended up being shared with everyone (as I'd wanted it to be), but only if they decided to come to the room to get it (whereas normally it would be taken to each of the classrooms).
Not only that, but one of her "friends" told the other teachers that she signed a card when they asked why there was no card passed around to sign for my co-teacher's birthday *facepalm* That REEEEALLY made things look bad!
I felt soooo bad, even though it wasn't my fault....it just put me in a bad spot! I apologized to the other teachers and aids and they told me they knew it wasn't my fault. I just thought the whole thing was a bit childish, but at the same time, she DOES have the right to decide who she wants to celebrate her birthday with! I guess it's because I'm more prone to do whatever is most congenial, whatever is most diplomatic. I remember my former friends from church used to tease me and say I'd even hug the devil lol. I guess it's just the way I grew up. I still try to be diplomatic although now that I've gotten older, there are some people that I genuinely do not like and would not entertain. But don't you have to kind of fake the funk sometimes? Especially in a work environment? Maybe not "faking" but be cordial? Where do you draw the line between being fulsome and fake and cordial and congenial?
I know you have to draw the line somewhere and know for yourself who you're true friends are and who the fakers are, but it just made me pretty uncomfortable to see things handled the way they were handled.
Anyway, the tradition's kind of stupid in a way because I had to buy the cake and the card with my money. If everyone wants to be a part, shouldn't everyone chip in to make the purchases? smh...gotta love working with teachers! Always some drama. They're worse than the kids sometimes lol :-D