Thanx for the encouragement. It's amazing when after 20yrs of not finding successful meds and hanging on by a thread and then coming to the realization that a supernatural being isn't watching, judging and threatening my "salvation" that i am now sooo much calmer and more pleasant to be around. It's awesome to come this far to even join this forum to finally find like-minded atheist friends. I heard so many times that "you are are your own worst enemy". To a point that might be true but in my case the belief in a god was. THANKS again!