Welcome toAtheist Universe
Sign Upor Sign In
Or sign in with:
Imagine No Religion
We are a worldwide social network of freethinkers, atheists, agnostics and secular humanists.
Madhav Prashanth Ramachandran
Give a Gift
Give a Gift
Give a Gift
Give a Gift
A group for freethinking humor. Let's share a good laugh, it always helps to see things more clearly.
Atheist Universe Comedy Cellar
Latest Activity: yesterday
Started by Mrs.B. Last reply by Mrs.B Aug 23, 2018.
In the news…Continue
Started by Tom Sarbeck. Last reply by Tom Sarbeck Aug 19, 2018.
Donald Trump, because there is no god.
Started by Mrs.B. Last reply by Mrs.B Feb 26, 2017.
Started by A Former Member. Last reply by Chris Nov 5, 2016.
Post your favorite stand-up comedian skits here. No limits on content, but if it is NSFW please say so. I like the old-timers. Here's a Phyllis Diller impersonator. Continue
Tags: humor, comedians, stand-up, comedy
Nice jokes Mrs.B very funny
Scump being roped in
We're not going to let this wild man run loose & trample our rights any more, he's been checked.
A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic Hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment. She asked, 'Do you have health insurance?' He replied in a raspy voice, 'No health insurance.' The nun asked, 'Do you have money in the bank?' He replied, 'No money in the bank.' The nun asked, 'Do you have a relative who could help you?' He said, 'I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun.' The nun became agitated and announced loudly, 'Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.' The patient replied, 'Oh that's grand news! Send the bill to my brother-in-law.'
Little Carol came into the kitchen where her mother was making dinner. Her birthday was coming up and she thought this was a good time to tell her mother what she wanted. "Mom, I want a bike for my birthday." Now, Little Carol was a bit of a troublemaker. She had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Carol's mother asked her if she thought she deserved to get a bike for her birthday. Little Carol, of course, thought she did. Carol's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted her to reflect on her behavior over the last year, and write a letter to God and tell him why she deserved a bike for her birthday. Little Carol stomped up the steps to her room and sat down to write God a letter. LETTER 1: Dear God: I have been a very good girl this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Carol Carol knew this wasn't true. She had not been a very good girl this year, so she tore up the letter and started over.
LETTER 2: Dear God: This is your friend Carol.. I have been a pretty good girl this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Carol Carol knew this wasn't true either. She tore up the letter and started again.
LETTER 3: Dear God: I know I haven't been a good girl this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good girl if you just send me a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Carol Carol knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get her a bike. By now, she was very upset. She went downstairs and told her mother she wanted to go to church. Carol's mother thought her plan had worked because Carol looked very sad. 'Just be home in time for dinner,' her mother said. Carol walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. She looked around to see if anyone was there. She picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary, slipped it under her jacket and ran out of the church, down the street, into her house and up to her room. She shut the door and sat down and wrote her letter to God.
LETTER 4: I GOT YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE. Signed, YOU KNOW WHO
That ass is no president!
Chris its funny because it's funny
Is Donald Trump a child out of controll because there is no congressional oversite.
I'd say "Yes."
What does that say about congress?
Donald Trump as much as many may dislike it is still the President of the U.S.A.
Yes, little twitler is having a tantrump.
Hahaha, Mrs. B. That trumpsky gif is hilarious
© 2019 Created by Atheist Universe.
Report an Issue |
Terms of Service
Please check your browser settings or contact your system administrator.