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We are a worldwide social network of freethinkers, atheists, agnostics and secular humanists.

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2018/09/copaken-kavanaugh...


The Kavanaugh allegations led me to reach out to the man who had assaulted me decades before.

Let me tell you what life was like as a girl in Montgomery County, Maryland, in the early 1980s. I am a year older than Christine Blasey Ford and a year younger than Brett Kavanaugh. I grew up in Potomac, Maryland, a few miles from both Holton Arms, Ford’s school, and Georgetown Prep, which Kavanaugh attended, but I went to my local public high school, Churchill. Never mind that any girl who was in high school in Potomac during that era knew, through the whisper network, not to go to a Georgetown Prep party alone. That was a given. What was also a given is that “date rape,” as a term, was in its infancy. Most of us thought getting our bodies groped at a high-school party—or anywhere—was the unfortunate price we paid for having them, not something we would ever go to the police to report.
Even in junior high school, this was true. I have a vivid memory of my friend Marcia having her skirt ripped off her body in the middle of a bar mitzvah dance floor. It had snaps down the middle. I actually heard one boy say, as she was weeping in a corner, trying to refasten her skirt, “I mean, duh. If you’re going to wear snaps on your skirt, what do you think will happen?” I made a mental note: Never wear snaps to a dance party.
Luckily, I survived high school without getting more than ickily groped now and then, but my luck ran out in college. I fell victim to a number of random assaults by strangers, including two robberies at gunpoint, all of which then became fodder for my senior thesis, but I wasn’t actually date raped until the night before my graduation, in June of 1988. Or maybe it was May. I don’t actually...……………...

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I suspect a lot of women have those type of experiences 

Yes, & we got poo-ed poo-ed if we even thought of mentioning it. Men were held in higher esteem, & we were treated as liars.

And i think we still have a problem believing women. About the men, people say things like it will ruin their career and what nots

Its not easy no matter how it goes.

I was molested by a family member, but the minute I told mother, I got yelled at for making it up.

I'm afraid that's a story that is happening all around the world 

Unfortunately, it is.

It's all very sad to say the least, It's really hard to speak up when you know you won't be believed and they play it off as a joke. 

Re-victimized again, & again. Its disgusting.

It really is.

Of course it gets relived every time the topic comes up, & it can never be kept on the back burner if it has to be gone over again & again, & again.

This is part of what makes it so annoying. It is to be ripped apart again and again

Boys will be boys is a crappy excuse.

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